So i’m at my local Woolies, doing the Big Shop, as you do. Pull the trolley into the checkout, behind mother and daughter tag-shopping team.
Except mum’s doing all the work while Princess thumbs through New Idea.
She’s a full princess, too. Thirteen going on 21. Still in school uniform. Babydoll socks with the gold anklet. Manicured fingernails complete with the latest glitter nail polish. Eye makeup on that would do a pole dancer proud. Quoiffed within an inch of her life.
They make their way thru the checkout process and that’s when i notice the checkout chick.
Her name’s Beth, according to her nametag, but i’m tipping she borrowed that off someone for the shift cos she left hers at home or something. Cos she seems more like a Spike or a Rusty to me.
Under her Woolies shirt is a t-shirt. Neither of them ironed. Her hair’s pulled back in the kind of ponytail that you usually see behind a computer when the coding’s getting tough. Held back with a lakky band and spit.
Beth’s got not a lick of warpaint on and she’s all business. Would you like extra cash? Just punch in your pin, then.
Princess, meanwhile, is eyeing Beth up and down like she’s just crawled out of a slimy green pod. You can tell she can’t wait to get on to Facebook to tell all her ‘friends’ – most of whom are pedos in disguise lurking around for something groomable – about the freak at Woolies.
Beth just wants to get home so she can work on hacking her iphone.
I know which one i’m gonna like better in 10 years.