a little rant about homophobia and a certain kind of man

Let me paint a picture for you. My local servo. 9.30pm on a sunday. I wander in to buy a soothing bucketload of chocolate, as you do. At the counter is a bloke and he’s ranting on at the young fella behind the counter.

He’s banging on about the flood levy and what a fucking unAustralian slag that Julia Gillard is, giving all that foreign aid to the bloody indonesians. I’m mildly amused about this as i just happened to have written about it in my latest blog post over at goldcoast.com.au — you’ll be unsurprised to learn that i was expressing the opposite view, however.

Now this bloke is what i call an ‘eighties man’. He’s probly knocking on 60′s door but he can’t quite bring himself to give up the Grecian 2000 and let a little gray into his life. Either that or he really needs to update his toupee. He’s got that big bushy mo that tells the world he’s never gone down on a woman and never will if he’s got anything to say about it. He irons his skintight jeans to a knife-edge. He’s got his CFMEU polo shirt on and his knuckle tatts say ‘love’ and ‘hat’ cos he lost his little finger somewhere. Probly up his own ass because he looks the type who would love to take it up there if he only had the balls to admit it to himself.

He then proves me right by switching his rant to the Greens and their gay, anti-fishing agenda. ‘first thing they’ll do is ban all recreational fishing down the east coast of australia,’ he opines. “second thing they’ll do is let the gays get married.”

By now, of course, i’m standing behind him in the queue. I lean forward and say quietly:

“careful mate, there’s a big old lesbian behind you, within touching distance.”

You’d think i’d rubbed an ice-cold dildo between his arsecheeks he moved that fast. Off he scurried and just before he walked out the door he yelled:

“You can listen to me, girlie, i don’t care.”

Well, he certainly told me.

Arseclown.

right-wing twat claims gay TSA officers will get turned on by patdowns

oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

It’s doubtful that those travelers were worried about whether or not the TSA agent conducting the screen was getting “turned on” in the process. But that is exactly the concern voiced by Peter LaBarbera, a long-time anti-gay activist and director of Americas for Truth About Homosexuality (AFTHA).

LaBarbera’s issued a press release detailing his concern that gay TSA employees will “get turned on” while patting down travelers of the same sex. LaBarbera challenged the TSA, arguing that if it is inappropriate for a male TSA worker to conduct a pat down of a female traveler, the same is true for gay employees. According to LaBarbera this is the perfect opportunity for gay workers to get a cheap thrill, all at the expense of an innocent traveler.

LaBarbera has demanded that the TSA put conditions of employment for self-acknowledged homosexuals and bar them from patting down travelers “so as to avoid being put in sexually compromising situations.”

So far the TSA has not commented on LaBarbera’s charges or his demands.

you can read the full twattage here.

dicks of the week .. sam newman, pat robertson and damir dokic

once again aussie footy show twat sam newman has been found in breach. when, oh when, will the nine network finally sack the arse?

During the relevant broadcast of the AFL Footy Show, presenter Sam Newman dressed a female mannequin to represent a well-known sports journalist. ACMA found that the broadcast was likely, in all the circumstances, to have provoked severe ridicule against the journalist on the grounds of gender.

ACMA identified a combination of cues and other components that contributed to its decision. The segment made use of, as a central focus, a female mannequin dressed in lace lingerie which the audience was asked to ‘pretend’ was the journalist concerned. Several comments were made about the journalist’s appearance and at one point a photograph was stapled to the mannequin’s head.

of course, the acma, are going to take adequate steps to punish newman … oh wait, no they’re not. weak.

meanwhile pat robertson has declared that legalising same-sex marriage is the start of the slippery slope to the legalisation of polygamy, bestiality, child molestation and pedophilia:

“You mark my words, this is just the beginning in a long downward slide in relation to all the things that we consider to be abhorrent,” said Robertson.

see the video at think progress.

meanwhile perennial dick damir dokic is getting some help from the embassy he threatened to blow up earlier this week.

DAMIR Dokic will be offered Australian consular assistance while he is in jail for allegedly threatening to kill Australia’s ambassador to Serbia.
The father of Australian tennis star Jelena Dokic is being held in a Serbian jail after police investigated alleged threats against ambassador Clare Bergin and found a cache of weapons, including two home-made bombs, at Dokic’s home north of Belgrade on Tuesday.

Dokic allegedly threatened to fire a rocket grenade at Ms Bergin’s car in response to an article in Australian magazine Sport&Style, which carries claims by Jelena that he physically abused her.

Detained in jail in Sremska Mitrovica, he faces up to three years’ jail on charges of endangering the security of Ms Bergin and possessing illegal firearms.

Foreign Minister Stephen Smith said today that as an Australian citizen, the 50-year-old was entitled to consular assistance.

read the whole hilarity at news.com.au

rudy giuliani is a dick

apparently friends in time of need are political liabilities when they choose to get married. in the words of the inimitable kent jones: WEAK.

The couple famously let the ex-mayor crash at their luxury $2.37 million three-bedroom Manhattan apartment while he was going through a nasty divorce with Donna Hanover in 2001. Later, Giuliani married the “other woman,” Judith Nathan.

“Rudy and Judith were both invited with a beautiful written invitation by mail,” said Koeppel. “His secretary called Thursday and said he was not able to come to the wedding and wished us all the best.”

Koeppel once quipped that Giuliani was a perfect roommate who “always made his bed” and “called me mother.”

At the time, Giuliani ducked the question about whether living with a gay couple had changed his longstanding opposition to gay marriage.

“I don’t relate to people as white, black, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, gay, lesbian, heterosexual,” the then-mayor told reporters at Gracie Mansion.

Giuliani has stated he has no problem with civil unions but told The Post he’d speak out against gay marriage if he runs for governor. Connecticut in November allowed gays to marry.</blockquote>
from that bastion of good taste, the new york post.